Dear Annabelle,
Today you graduate from high school. You were born such an old soul, so to me, these rituals feel a little funny. And a little sad, because this means you will “leave leave” soon, as one mom (whose kid is staying in town for college) put it to me last night at your final high school dance performance. I know you’ll never really leave us — and it feels funny for me to give you advice, since pretty much everything I know that’s worth knowing, you’ve taught me. But I feel the need to send you into the world with a little advice, so here goes. Nineteen pieces of wisdom for the Class of 2019.
1. Do not cut bangs. You’ve made it this far — be strong. I can send you a picture of me from eighth grade if you need a reminder.
2. Marry someone smarter than you. The other stuff will shake out. But you need to feel like this person is your intellectual equal — at least. They should feel the same about you.
3. Keep dancing, making art, playing music.
4. Tell people what you think, but be careful about when and how you do it. Be honest but consider feelings — and consequences.
5. As soon as you can (but not during college), get a big dog. At least one.
6. See live music whenever you can.
7. Take risks, whatever that looks like for you. For your dad, that means scaling big mountains and taking on politicians. For me, it means pitching big stories and going to scary places. It will look different for you, it does for everyone.
8. Here is the key to baking, from your great grandmother Evelyn Sealove: BUTTER.
9. Read for pleasure, no matter how busy you are with other things. It’s the best way to be a good writer/thinker/talker/human being. It doesn’t need to be the “great books.” Read what you love, whatever that is.
10. Avoid unnecessary left turns.
11. Eat more protein.
12. If you’re going to talk behind someone’s back, make sure they can’t hear you.
13. If you are stressed out, take a deep breath.
14. Call your mother. And your father. Check your email once in a while.
15. Make new friends, and continue to treasure the old ones. Don’t let them slip away.
16. Travel whenever you get the chance. Pick your traveling companions well.
17. Practice the Golden Rule. It applies to everything.
18. Don’t get caught.
19. And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make. That’s from the Beatles. You can pretty much figure out life from their lyrics.
And finally, remember how much Dad, Sophie and I love you. Always.
xoxoxo Mom